Heartbroken Mother Speaks Out 2 Years after Her 12-Weeks-Old Son Was Killed

Rachel Surtees recalls the devastating loss, the pain of grieving, and her mission to honor her baby boy's memory and protect other children.

Rachel Surtees will never forget the day two detectives knocked on her door to deliver the news that changed her life forever — her 12-week-old son had been found unresponsive. Now, two years later, she is speaking out.

When police arrived at her door that spring morning, Rachel learned that her baby boy, Hudson Bibby, had been found unresponsive at his father Carl Bibby's home in Newcastle, England.

Hours later, officers explained that Carl had also taken his own life. "The man I had trusted to take care of our little boy was the reason he was no longer here," Rachel said. "It shattered my world."

A respiratory nurse from Newcastle, Rachel met Carl in April 2022 on a dating site. Both were single parents, and at first, their connection was casual. "We went on a couple of dates and would take our kids out together, but our relationship wasn't particularly serious," she recalled.

Then, months later, she was shocked to discover she was pregnant. Because she had lost a fallopian tube in an ectopic pregnancy years earlier, the news came as a complete surprise.

"Carl didn't seem happy with the pregnancy in the initial stage," she revealed. "But he did come to the 20-week scan and asked for a picture."

Their relationship never became romantic again, and by the time Hudson was born, the pair were more like friends than partners. Still, Rachel wanted her son to know his father.

After Hudson's birth in February 2023, she arranged visits with Carl, first for short periods and eventually overnight. "Every two weeks I'd drop Hudson to his dad for a couple of hours, hoping they would bond," she recalled. "There were no red flags in my eyes."

But just weeks later, her worst fears came true. Hudson died in April 2023 after a stay at his father's apartment, and forensic evidence later revealed he had also sustained a prior brain bleed during an earlier visit.

Forensic experts concluded that Hudson had suffered fatal head injuries after being violently shaken and thrown. An inquest in November 2024 confirmed that his cause of death was blunt force trauma and ruled that he had been unlawfully killed by his father.

The coroner's findings gave Rachel the confirmation she had long suspected but could not fully face. "We knew Carl was responsible, but seeing it written down was so very important to me," she explained. "I wanted justice for Hudson. [...] Carl taking his life robbed me of finding out why it all happened."

The news left Rachel reeling. She recalled the agonizing moment she identified her son's body at the RVI mortuary in Newcastle. "Standing in the mortuary I saw his tiny face. He looked as though he was sleeping," she shared.

Returning home without Hudson was also unbearable, as she saw reminders of him everywhere — his Moses basket beside her bed, the lingering scent of his clothes and toys.

More than 100 mourners gathered at Tynemouth Crematorium on May 16, 2023, for Hudson's funeral. His wicker casket was carried in by grieving relatives and friends, a moment Rachel described as "the hardest thing I will ever do."

Over time, despite the anger she still felt toward Carl, Rachel acknowledged that he may have been struggling mentally. "I wish Carl had gotten help for any mental health issues that I believe led to Hudson's death," she said.

As for her grieving, she leaned on support from friends, family, and even Carl's relatives. She also crowdfunded a memorial bench overlooking a beach Hudson loved. "I sit there most days and remember the three months he was with us," she recalled. "He radiated joy, and my other two boys adored him."

Rachel also rebuilt her life with the help of a longtime friend who became her partner. Then, in September 2024, she gave birth to Georgie, a daughter she describes as a gift in her darkest hour.

"She is not a replacement for Hudson, no one ever could be, but she was a glimmer of light in such a dark time," Rachel stated. "Georgie brings me joy and hope again."

In the two years since Hudson passed, Rachel has shared her journey publicly to raise awareness about baby loss and connect with other grieving parents.

She has spoken about her PTSD and depression on social media, and during Baby Loss Awareness Week in 2024, she honored Hudson with a TikTok tribute.

On the second anniversary of his death in April 2025, she posted a heartfelt message on Facebook that read in part, "Two whole years ago today my world shattered into a million pieces. My beautiful 12-week-old son was stolen from me in the most horrific way possible, at the hands of a man who was meant to protect him."

While Rachel admits she still struggles to reach full acceptance of her son's death, she is determined that Hudson's short life will have lasting meaning.

"I will dedicate my life to Hudson's legacy and to other babies that can't speak for themselves," she said. "He might be gone, but his spirit lives on in me and my children."